As I mentioned in my earlier post that the later post would be followed by marriage and then death rites, but alas I could not post it as planned i.e. a week after my first post. I was pretty much busy with my exams and many other things. Now am so glad that my summer holidays started and I can spend much of my time on my cause - this blog.
So here I go........ (though I must warn you, this is going to be a very long post)
MARRIAGE RITES
According to customs prevailed in the Chakma Society marriage can be held only between
Khellya Kudum ( even relation) ie between the same generation or alternate generation and it should not be of the same
Goza (Sept). And if of the same sept there should be a gap of seven generation from the family. However, marriage between a related grand father and grand daughter ,a related grand mother and grand son and vise versa is practicable. (It should be noted that in the Chakma society, the term used for grandparents are the same for great uncles/aunts as well). Nowadays, after late Bhuban Mohan Roy, the Chakma Chief who reportedly married his related grand daughter, has permitted marriage from a gap of five generation of the same sept. The following are the marriageable relation prevalent in the society :
(a) between cousins like father's sister's daughter ;
(b) with father's cousin sister's daughter and vise versa ;
(c) with father's cousin brother's daughters and vise versa if not of the same sept, and there is a gap of five generation if from the same sept;
(d) with maternal aunt's daughters and vise versa;
(e) with mother's cousin sister's daughters;
(f) with mother's cousin brother's daughter;
(g) any one from other sept if of the same generation;
(h) the younger sister-in-laws of elder/older brothers;
(i) younger cousin-sister-in-laws of elder/older brothers;
(j) Elder/older sister's younger sister-in-laws;
(j) Elder/older sisters brother in laws;
(k) own younger sister in laws/cousin sister in laws, brother inlaws/causin brother in laws.
A marriage in the Chakma society may be performed in two ways i.e.
Mela : the conventional method in which a bride is brought to groom's house, and the other
Jameia or
Jamei Tulhee Dena (literally to lead or to put the groom in the bride's house) where , instead of taking the bride to groom's house, the groom goes to the bride's. In this process the relatives of the groom lead him to the bride's house and the marriage ceremony is performed there and the he remains there for a certain period of time say one year, two years etc. This system is applied when :-
(a) the groom is poor and cannot afford the marriage expenditure and when the brides father is ready to bear it,
(b) When the groom has got no well-to-do relatives,
(c) When the parents of the bride have got no other earning male members,
(e) The parents of the bride do not want to part with their daughter due to affection,and
(f) A death has occurred in the year in the house of the bride,etc.
In a
Jameia, all the marriage rites like
Jaqdan,
Chumulang,
Byah Burh etc are performed in the bride's house. However, the
Byah Sudh Bhanga, Bizu Beran, etc are done at the house of the groom or his relatives. According to customs, the mother of the bride must receive at least two rupees as
Dudholee Tenga (price for breast feeding) and
Dabha (bride price) from the grooms. Other wise it becomes
Kanya Daan (gifting of daughter). In such a case the parent of the bride losses the right even of the shade of their daughter, let alone talk about visit, drinking and eating. Since as per Chakma custom, once you have gifted anything to anybody, you loss all the rights and interest on such thing. A Chakma boy get married at about eighteen to twenty one years of age and a girl is married off at the age of about fifteen to twenty. However marriageable bachelors of the age of about thirty and boys of the age of sixteen years were also seen to have got married. It may be due to economic condition of the groom or for not getting a suitable bride or for the demand of old relatives that they want to see grandchildren and great grandchildren before death.
In a marriage, the parent of the groom and his relatives gather information for a bride. In choosing a bride they had to look into the reputation of the bride's clan. : Whether they are lazy;Or whether anyone is suffering from incurable and communicable diseases like leprosy, tuberculosis ;Whether the girl is clean and expert in household works and weaving.
Arranged Marriages:
In a an arranged marriage,the parents of a prospective groom will collect information for a suitable bride through friends or relatives. They had to consider the relation first with their son and the prospective bride. According to custom, the relation should not be as under :
She should not be an aunt or niece to the groom,
She should not be of the same
Gutthi (clan), and
If of the same
Gutthi, there should be at least a gap of five to seven generations.
Qualities Of A Bride :
A bride should know the art of weaving. She should be beautiful with long hair and even teeth. She should talk cheerfully and sweetly. She should know to respect elders and be obedient to them. She should also know to love and pamper young ones. She should know cleanliness and do all household chores like cooking, drawing water, collecting fire woods, cleaning the hours, collect vegetables and do cleaning and shieving of rice. She also should be active in jhum work and paddy husking.
On finding such a suitable girl,the boy's father will send a messenger to the girl's father for permission to visit. If the reply is affirmative, the boys father will visit the girl's house with one bottle of wine accompanied by at least one elder who is expert in marriage negotiation. They may also take with them, apple snails to be cooked and taken for dinner, and then strewing the shells and lids .This was reportedly done to examine the girls expertise in sweeping the house.While visiting and going back, omens are observed and many promising matches are said to be put off to a stop for the unfavourable omens. A man or woman found to carry fowl, water, fruit, milk etc is believed to be good omen. In short, it should not be empty. On the other, kite, vulture, crow, empty pitcher, dead body of a man or animal is believed to be unfavourable bad omen. Finding a dead inguana, monitor lizard, turtle is believed to be bad omen even in normal travel. For which the rite
'Burpara' needs to be performed. On reaching the girl's house they will be given water to wash the feet and seated on a mat called
Padee. They will be then offered cool water from a
Kutti (traditional earthen water jugs ) and afterwards
Daba (bamboo hubble-bubble) and
Paan . After taking these things and exchange of pleasentaries and on health . After a few moment rest the boy's father will offer the bottle of wine to girl's father with folded hand and start dialogue.. In the meantime the girl's father will call some of his relatives to assemble in the discussion. The wine bottle will then be distributed and taken. The girls father may also take out some wine bottles from his side and the discussion will go on. At first the offer will be symbolic like – “ I have a mango seed would you allow me to plant it on your land ?” “ I am a thirsty traveler, will you allow me to rest under your shade ?” - that he want to make golden relation with them, or that he want to construct a golden bridge with them , etc.etc. They will then exchange views and also discuss about the relation. If everything matches, the bride's father may then reply the boy's father to come a second time and they may fix a date. If their likings and quiries does not match, he may tell him that he had not yet decided to marry off his daughter or that he had not yet consulted his relatives and he will intimate the decision in time. The first visit is also called
Sangudwar Ban (closing the entry gate) and visit of other parent or guardian for selection of bride will be treated as illegal. They may be fined for such violation until the first party has been terminated. The girl may also be regarded as
Dhora Jhum (selected jungle for jhumming). In the meantime he will consult his relatives and collect information on the prospective groom, his character , his activity, about their clan and disease and illness. If the groom is of their liking, he will send message to the groom's father for the second visit. Or else, he may inform them not to visit again in polite manner.
The second time visit of the boy's father is called
Dwi Pur (second date). During the second visit, the boy's father has to carry presents in pairs i.e. two bottles of wine, two bottles of rice beers, sweetmeats, coconut etc. Some people have the custom to carry double distilled wine and all presentaries in pair. If everything goes alright during
Dwi Pur, the girl's father may asks the boy's father to make the third visit on a appointed day
The third visit is called
Tin Pur (third date). In this third visit, the groom's parents are accompanied with more relatives and experts on marriage matters. They need to carry with them chicken, wine,
Kanjee,
Jagarha,
Pidha(rice cakes) and
Mema Mishri (sweets and sweetmeats, palm sugar) , coconut, sugarcane, along with
Paan-subori (betel nuts and leaves). If the wine,etc .called
Mat Pillang is accepted, every things are settled like bride price (which was usually Rupees One Hundred to One Hundred and Fifty, but nowadays Five Thousand to Fifteen Thousand in Mizoram, if the girl has eloped with a boy), demand of other provisions from the girl's side like ornaments, dresses, rice, wine, animals like buffalo, pig, chicken etc for the marriage feast. If the demand is more, bargaining goes on. Sometimes it so happens that the relatives of the girl, like uncle, elder brother, grand father etc .used to give concession and reduce the demand as a gesture of good relation. Sometimes a promising marriage is also called off on the inability to pay from the boy's side. After the demands have been fixed and came to an agreement, a certain date is fixed for the wedding. For the inability to give in marriage on the appointed day, without a legitimate cause, both sides may be punished with fine and compensations.
Before the appointed day of wedding, the groom party has to arrange and fulfill all the demands of the bride party. Other wise, the marriage may be cancelled and the grooms father may be fined or asked to pay compensation. On the other hand if the brides father deny to marry off his daughter, he may also be fined and asked to pay compensation.
On the appointed day of wedding, the groom party consisting of a younger sister or cousin sister of the groom (
Phur Bugiya), one experienced woman (
Bo Dhuriya- lirerary 'One who holds the bride
' or
Hadeya), one best man (
Sawala) and other elders , young girls and boys, usually friends and relatives of the groom will reach the bride's house. The groom party should always be in pair. Nobody is allowed to accompany a marriage procession from the midway. Every member of a marriage procession must start from the house of the groom.. The party will also take with them all the demanded materials like dress and ornaments for the bride, the bride price etc. On reaching the bride's house they are not instantly allowed to enter the house. They are first asked to sit at the courtyard where mats are spread for them. Then they are provided with
Panhee Kutti (traditional earthen water jugs
), Daba Dhundo (bamboo hubble-bubble and tobacco
) and Paan Subori (betel nuts and leaves
). After a while when the host is ready to welcome the groom party, they will be invited to enter the house. It is customary that feet of the groom should be washed by the younger brother or younger cousin brother of the bride. They will be provided mats or clothes will be spread for their sitting arrangement. After a rest, the
Sawala will seek permission from the parent of the bride for dressing up the bride. If permitted, he will take out all the dress and ornaments and arrange it on a shieve. It will then be passed to all the assembled elders and relatives for their blessing. They will bless it blowing air from the mouth with the prayer for the couples peace and happiness, health and permanent bonding. That they should never be separated and their pair should remain intact during their whole life time. Afterwards. the
Sawala will start dressing up the bride with the help of
Sawali (bridesmaid),who is a friend of the bride. Sometimes it so happens that the girl opposes to dress up. In such a case she is forcefully dressed up. The bride and groom are kept in one room in the night with some other of their friends. There may be whole night enjoyment to celebrate the occasion with dancing, singing and drinking.
On the next day the '
Jadan' ceremony is performed. At a
Jadan, the
Sawala or an
Ojha (exorcist) will mix some cooked rice with boiled eggs and also keep ready two betel rolls. He will ask the couple to sit side by side (male at the right and female at left) and bind a white scarf or cloth around them and seek permission from the assembled members of the society for binding
Jadan of the couple. The assembled people will say in unision
“aghe ! aghe!" (yes, yes). Then he will ask the couple to exchange egged rice and the betel rolls. After the exchange is over, he will again seek permission from the society to untie the bind. On getting affirmative reply he will untie it and the
Jadan rite is over. As an age old rule, a
Jadan should be between two persons and it is the meeting of two souls. So
Jadan with a pregnant woman is not permitted. It sometimes so happens that while seeking permission to bind a
Jadan, somebody may object if he had affairs with the girl. In such a case, the objector has to prove his relation. If he fails to prove the relation he is fined for causing shame. If he proves, the parent of the girl is fined for causing shame to the groom's. He is also to compensate the expenditure of the groom party. However
Jadan ceremony may be performed in the groom's house also.
In the afternoon the bride is sent off. Before leaving the house the bride will salute all her elders , and with her friends and youngers ,she will also be advised by the parent not to neglect her duty, that she should respect her in laws. The bride's father may say to his son-in-law “ Take her, I have given her to you; but she is young and not acquinted with household duties. Therefore if, at any time you come back from work and find the rice burnt, curries salty or salt less or anything else wrong, teach her, but do not beat her. But at the end of three years, if she is still found neglecting her duties, you may beat her but do not take her life or make her blind or break any bone .” The bride is also advised not to take anything before looking into others' share. That she should not get irritated on minor matters. She is also handed over to the groom and in-laws with the request that their daughter being naïve and young may commit mistakes and she should be handled carefully. Afterward she comes out from the house tearing seven strings of thread which symbolizes separation from her clan and entry into her husband's clan. At present, the rite of
Sat Nal Sudho Kabana ( literary, tearing of seven strings of thread
) is very rarely observed. The bride may also br accompanied by her relatives and friends, to see off her. Some of the friends may stay with the bride for days till the first visit called
Byahsuth Bhanga.
On arriving the groom's house , the bride is given a warm welcome. Somebody from the procession will seek permission to admit the bride into the house and the father of the groom will permit. The mother of the groom will hug the bride and lead her to the seat kept for the bride. Before making entry, feet of the bride is washed by the younger sister of the groom. Here the relatives and friends of the bride are royally treated. That’s why the people of bride side is called
Arhi Dhinnya Raja (two and a half days King). Every comfort of them are looked into . They are provided with good food, good bed and good drinks etc during their stay. Whole the night drinking, eating and singing goes on . Dancing troupe perform their dance and singing the whole day. A wealthy family may solemnize a wedding with fire works.
CHUMULANG :
On the next day, the main rite of a marriage :
'Chumulang' is performed. It is the worship of family deities called
Kaleia,
Parameswari and
Ochsya . These Deities are identified with Hindu gods, Shiva, Parvati and Ganesha . Some people also worship Michchingya ,the mythological human husband of Laxmi, the goddess of wealth. (As per Chakma mythology - '
Laxmi Pala', when the Gozen created man, He first asked him to talk and the answer was rice : "Oh Manei Mat" - "Oh Gozen Bhat" meaning "Oh human talk !" – "Oh God rice ! ") . It is performed for the welfare of conjugal life and the family.It is performed for two purposes, one for marriage and the other for the family called
Gristi Chumulang, which is performed every year at the beginning of new year. The
Gristi Chumulang may be performed any time for damage of crops, loss of property, and frequent illness in the family or after the death of a family member.The method of performance is same and few words are different at the time of chanting prayers. The
Chumulang is believed to be the first worship of the mankind after the creation of the universe. It is solemonised by an
Ojha (Exorcist/ Priest) who may also be a
Vaidya (physician).
Method :
For performing a
Chumulang Puja, the intended voter or any of the family member will first arrange one bottle of special wine and one bottle of special
Kanjee (beer of common rice) or
Jagarha (beer of sticky rice) which should never be tasted by anyone. If a
Chumulang is not performed for unavaoidable reason, such a wine should be flown in the river. Three chickens are also required for sacrifice, of which one should be cock, one hen and the other may be either . Some even sacrifice pig. Before the day of
Chumulang, the intende voter or any member of his family will approach the
Ojha with a cup of
Mat (wine) and state vowing – “ I am inviting you to be the
Ojha of my /our
Jora/Gristi Chumulang tomorrow. You are requested to perform the rite and disclose all the good and bad of us.” The
Ojha will drink the wine and agree to perform it. At bedtime he will light lamps and make prayers to God to appear before him in dream so that he can foretell the future of the couple and the family. He will also sleep putting the wine cup under his pillow. The next day he will go to the family and make preparation. At first the place where
Chumulang is to be performed (usually the middle room of the house called
Matdhya Gudhi is sanctified by sprinkling
Kojoi Panhee. He will then ask to bring
Aag Panhee ( the first water ie. The water to be carried by the bride and groom from the river for the purpose and none should use even a single drop for other purpose. The bride will carry the water with a
Kutti, an earthen jug and the groom with a
Kum:an earthen pitcher). It should be remembered that no drop of water should spill from the
Kum and the
Kutti. .
An altar is to be made. For the altar, first a bamboo mat called
Toloi is spread. Above that, plantain leaves are spread. One small basket of paddy (measuring five pots ie. about two and half kilo) and one basket of rice ( of the same measure) are to be placed at the right and left.. He will then place the
Kum on the right side and the
Kutti on the left. Above the baskets he will place bamboo mats made of bamboo tapes ( seven pair by seven pair on the rice basket and five pair by five pair on the paddy basket). He will then coil seven string of cotton around the rice basket and the
Kutti and five strings around the paddy basket and the
Kutti. He will also coil five string of thread around the neck and pipe of the
Kutti. He will again make one more mat for the other deity
Michchingya with a roof and place at the left. Three bamboo chips with downward bristles called
Marei/Malei Keim are posted perforating one pair each of tips of jack fruit leaves or similar thick leaves ( paired one face up and another face down) on the rice basket, the tips of which are bound together and in between the chips an egg is placed with a lump of earth. in each mat of baskets. A roof called
Pang is made on the paddy basket with plantain leaves. .Two more plantain leaves are spread (one face up and one face down) at the left of paddy basket and one more
Marei/Malei Keim is posted for
Michchingya. One pair each of
Malei/Marei Keim are also posted in fron of the rice and paddy basket. . Flowers are also offered in pairs on the alter and the plat form is now ready for worship. First the
Ojha will light the
Cheraks (lamps) and offer wine in front of the paddy basket,
Kanjee in front of rice basket and sprinkle both on the platform meant for
Michchingya. The
Ojha will then bow with the prayer that –
“Ahem ! God Kalia ! I am performing this pairing
Chumulang Puja for such and such (the couple), kindly accept it and all their misfortune, ill luck, ill fate, diseases, unhappiness, sorrows and all other bad things to come should be destroyed. All sharp and pointed weapons against them should get blunt. On their reaching to a thorny bush it should turn into a perfumed flower garden. The barren land should turn into a fertile golden mine at their touch. The earth should yield gold at their touch. Let the fire of their house never extinguish. They should lead a happy and prosperous married life, with all the riches. Their house should be filled with food grains, clothes, precious gems and metals. Their fame should reach country to country. They should have many children and their house should be struck between cradles of children and their first child should have fair skin at the testicles. Their house should be visited by relatives and guests and the handle of their house step should get polished with the ups and downs of relatives and guests visiting. Let there be not a day without a guest and their fame should reach beyond the country. They should be worshipped even by the enemies. Let the stone breake away or get breakage mark but their pair should never break. Or take the mark of breakage. I am offering this cock for the couple, you please accept it .I am offering it raising it on my head, you please accept it on your hand. I am offering this for the couple, keeping the sun, the moon, the planets, stars and the four saints of the four corners as witnesses If you have any grudge or anger on them and decided to take their lives, you please spare them and in their place take this cock ! You will get blood for blood, meat for meat, head for head, hands for wings, leg for leg, liver for liver, lungs for lungs, intestine for intestine, gizzard for stomach, eye for eye, and you can satisfy all the taste of their body parts. But you please spare their lives. You being a divine deity ,you live in the Heaven and we live on the earth. I cannot have direct conversation with you. The communication between Heavenly body and human being is done with a medium and I will use rice and tips of leaves called
Aag Pada as a medium for communication.. So I will throw tips of leaves to communicate with you. If both the leaves fall face upward, I will presume that you are happy and laughing. We are also laughing today to our heart's content as we are happy with joy. If both fall face downward, I will take it as you are angry. In that case I will seek your forgiveness for the couple through the leaves tips. If after seeking forgiveness the leaves again fall face down I will change the leaves as it is said that the leaves also have relation and they cannot form pair, with brotherly sisterly relation. And if the leaves fall one face up and one face down, I will presume that you have accepted the offering and you will spare their lives.”
He will then throw the tips of leaves and if it fall one face up and one face down, he will slit the throat of the cock and sprinkle the blood on the paddy basket. Likewise, he will put the same prayer before the rice basket and the platform of
Michchingya with the other chicken and sprinkle the blood and at last, the pig (if a pig is to be sacrificed). He will then ask the couple to bow. This sacrifice is called
Kaja Page Gojanha (raw offering). Afterward he will ask the chicken to be dressed and cooked without cutting into pieces.. When the chicken are cooked, he will change the leaves with new one and again offer them before the deities, the cock, in front of paddy basket, the hen and the egg before the rice basket and the other chicken in front of
Michchingya. He will also offer the wine and
Kanjee. He will also offer rice and other curries for seven times. He will also exchange the courses between
Kalia and
Parameswari. The exchange of offering is believed to be able to clear up the ill feeling of the deities so that, they cannot say that the things offered to them were less tasty than the other. If they feel so, the offering will not be perfect and it has to be performed again. He will also offer the dresses head of the pig in front of the three platforms. This offering is called
Sichya Page Gojanha (cooked offering). He will again put prayer for the couple as early as possible and ask the couple to bow again. He will then offer prayer before the deities to show the future of the couple in the form of sign in the parts of the chicken, the egg and rice called
Aag Pach and the rite of is called
Chamba Chahna. After some times he will take out the offerings and examine the chicken, egg and rice for omen
CHAMBA CHAHNA :
The foretelling signs which are looked into and examine on the offerings are as under :
(1)If the fingers of the chicken are found uneven or if there is any hollow between the fingers it is understood as simpleton and he or she will not be able to accumulate any wealth. Also it means that no secrecy will remain a secret with him or her.
(2) If there is no hollow it means a miser and accumulation of wealth.
(3) On taking out the tongue of the chicken a triden appears. If the middle portion is longer than the other it means a funeral pole which means early death. If it is coiled it means wealth for the male and good luck for the female.
(4) On shelling the egg if a cross appears, the male must become a novice in the temple for at least seven days.
(5) If the flat portion of the egg is displaced, it means displacement and change of residence or a broken family.
(6) If a crack in the middle, a misfortune.
(7) Foul smell denotes bad relation.
The
Ojha also performs the rite called ‘
Sadhur Mari Dehna’ (killing or destroying the enemies). In this rite he will assemble all the left outs of
Chamba i.e. the tongues, beaks, egg shells, bones etc. on plantain leaves. There he will put burning charcoal and put some wine and mustard seeds in his mouth and utter -
"Ahem… taking
Preta and
Ajurho (deity of wine) as witness, today I am extinguishing all ill fate and ill luck of the couple as at the curse of the
Kushyas maternal uncle a gem headed serpent died getting into pieces at every curse. He cursed seven times invoking truth and the serpent become seven pieces. So also I am throwing
Ajurho king (wine) on all ills and ill future of the couple . With the dropping of
Ajurho, all ills and ill futures of such and such should get into pieces. If I drop one drop it should become two pieces, if five drops, five pieces, if seven drops, seven pieces. As if water dropped on fire extinguishes it, so also all ills, all ill future of so and so should extinguish. I am destroying the enemies of so and so, keeping the moon, the sun, the earth, fire, water planets and stars also
Ajurho (wine) as witnesses. That all the ill fate, ill luck, loss, illness, diseases, misfortune and accident etc of such and should destroy like the water extinguishing a burning fire. Their ill luck, ill future , misfortune, should reach beyond seven seas and seven Lankas or islands at the throwing of this wine and water. They should have a long, healthy and prosperous life. That their house should fill with gold, silver and other precious metal and stones. They should never face a poverty and dearness of dress and ornaments. They should have lots of children so that there is collision between cradles . They should always have guest in their house and their door handle should get polished with the entry and exit of guests. They should have and rear sheds full of four footed animals and birds. Their fame should reach country to country and they should live to able to see great great great grand children.They should be worshipped even by the enemies. "
With this he will throw wine and water till the charcoal are extinguished and throw it below.. He will also thank the chicken and the animal for their use in the
Chumulang rite and will make prayer for their better life in the next birth that the chicken should be born as golden eared myna and the pig as a monkey so that he can take the first fruits of trees. Then the couple will take his blessings.
In the meantime, feast will be ready and the couple will offer the lunch plates (usually prepared on a
Mejang :a bamboo plaited platform used for taking food sitting. Above the platform plantain leaves are spread and on which rice, curry etc are put to prepare the dish.) to some of the elders like grand parents of both side, parents, elders of parents with salute and they will bless them for healthy, prosperous, long merrily life.
Mat (wine),
Kanjee,
Jagarha and other drinks will also be offered to all if available before the start of feast. After the feast is over and all the guests are entertained with
Daba (bamboo hubble-bubble ) and betel rolls. The
Sawala will lead the newly wed couple to every elders of the couple. Who will bow them touching the feet and the elders will bless them blowing air on rice and cotton and putting them on their forehead (which the
Sawala carries with him) and paying some money, wishing the couple a long, healthy and prosperous life. The rice, cotton, money symbolizes prosperity of food, clothes and power. This blessing is called
Sep Dehna.
KHANA SIRANA :
After taking the feast, the people will rest for some times. Some may even take siesta. At around three to four the village elders and members of the society will assemble and the couple will again offer a big dish with every possible courses of curry, meat, sweetmeats, wine, beer, cakes, fruits etc. The groom will declare that he want to throw a
Khana (feast) to enable him to become a member of the society. He or on his behalf the
Sawala will first seek permission from the assembled
Dus Murubbi to throw the Khana. “That the couple has arranged a Khana and the
Dus Murubbi should accept it and accept the couple as a member of the society. They should taste all the courses like rice, birnee rice, meat, fish, sweet, bitter, sour and other courses and accept the couple. That no one should blame the couple for not providing a
Khana to the society. On this, the assembled people will permit him and they will remove the cover of the dishes and they will try to appease all by providing every items like sweet, sour, bitter etc. at their demand. If they cannot fulfill the demanded items, they had to seek for pardon for the inability. It is believed that there should be a quarrel and fight even a mocked one at the time of
Khana to complete it. Somebody who bears grudge with the groom used to demand impossible things and the considerate people would plead in favour of the groom and quarrel starts. However, if the majority people are found satisfied, the
Sawala will seek permission to close the
Khana dish. .And if permitted, the
Khana Sirana rite is complete. From that day, the newly wed couple will be treated as a member of the society.
A
Khana Sirana rite may be performed even after years of marriage if the economic condition is not good. There was a rule that if a married man dies without offering a
Khana, his body should be disrespected and carried below the knee. However, his children and relatives may seek forgiveness from the society by offering a bottle of wine and if accepted, his body may be carried on shoulders.
In the evening, the newly wed couple will first go to the riverghat and take bith. They will also worship the
Gongi Maa (river goddess) with lamps and flowers.Afterwards they will go to the temple and offer flowers and light candles and seek blessing for better future life.
As per custom, a newly wed couple is treated impure. So they need to perform the rite
Bur Para at the river ghat by appeasing the river goddess
Ganga. It may be with lamps and flowers or with animal sacrifice like a pair of chicken or a goat. It vary from
Ojha to
Ojha and as per the method they have learnt from their guru.( It is said that there were nine hundred thousands of sages who learnt the mantras and pujas in different ways ). Unless this
Bur Para rite is performed, the newly wed should not enter others' houses. Otherwise, they may be fined for causing impurity. For that they will have to bear all the expenditure for performing a
Bur Para like chicken etc, as that family have perform it to gain back purity.
In a
Bur Para , the
Ojha leads the couple to the riverghat. There he makes a platform on four bamboo posts. He puts some bamboo chips as a floor of the platform. On which he puts a lump of earth. Above that he put one bamboo chip with downward bristle ( called
Malei Keim) perforating two leaves as in other sacrificial platform. He then pours one bamboo tube of water and chants mantras, blowing air on the water. He puts it on the platform. After lighting lamps, he will lift the chicken and chants prayer that he is offering the chicken in lieu of the couple and that the couple should be spared if they have offended her. He is offering blood for blood, meat for meat, liver for liver etc etc. He will also test whether the offering is accepted with the help of
Aag Pada as in other pujas and later sacrifice the chicken. At last he will wet the side hair of the couple with mantra chanted water and ask them to go home without looking back and the
Bur Para is over.
However all marriages do not go in happy way. It often happens that a boy and girl makes up their mind to marry, but the parents would not hear of it. In such a case the the lovers elope together. It the parents of the girl is very much against the match, they have the right to take back their daughter and marry off with other boy. If notwithstanding the opposition of the parent, the lover still elope for the third time, no one has the right to interfere with them and they can marry.
BYAH SUTH BHANGA
The first visit to the parents and in-laws by the newly wed couple is called
Byah Suth Bhanga. There they need to stay for few days. At the time of going for the
Byah Suth Bhanga visit, the couple must be accompanied by the
Sawala, some old lady and friends. They will also take with them presents like wine, beer, coconut, cakes, fruits and drinks, dresses etc. for the members of the father-in-laws' family and for other relatives like grandfather-in-law, grandmother-in-law, uncle-in-laws and aunt-in-laws. It is also a customary for the in-laws to send back some presents at the time of return of the couple.
BIZU BERAN
Bizu Beran is the second compulsory visit by a newly wed couple to the relatives of the bride during the period of first Bizu (traditional New Year) after the marriage. During this visit also, presents for all the relatives needed to be arranged along with wine, beer, sweets etc.
MODERN MARRIAGE
Nowadays, the conventional way of performing marriage rite is almost over in the town area and among the educated elites. Since performance of conventional
Chumulang with sacrifice of animal is not Buddhistic. So, instead of performing the
Chumulang , a marriage is performed with a Buddhist monk or a devotee called
Lukthak (who is usually an ex-monk) and who is well versed with the marriage process. In a marriage with the help of a monk or
Lukthak , a
Pujo/Puja is arranged where all provisions for listening religious discourses called
Mangal Sutta or
Pharekh , five measures of rice, one coconut, one
Magal Ghat (a water pot) mango leaves, basil leaves, betel leaves, sugar cane, flowers, a big paper flower called
Jhonga Phool , nine strings of thread roll, candles or oil lamps, insense sticks, and other provisions like sweets, fruit drinks are arranged on a big
Kulo (shieve). First the
pujo is placed in front of Buddha idol (if arranged in the temple) or in a corner of the house.It is sanctified with
Kojoi Panhee or sandal wood dipped water. After lighting candles, the couple is asked to bow and pray. Afterward the five precepts of Buddhism ie. Pancha Sheela ( ie. Not to kill, not to steal , not to tell lies, not to commit adultery and not to take intoxicants to the extend of losing sense) is administered to all the assembled, and religious discourses like
Karananiya Metta Sutta,
Mangal Sutta, etc are recited befitting the occasion. Afterward, the
Pujo provisions are dedicated .The couple is also taught about their duties to parents, elders, youngers and to each other. Both parent also advise their wards and at last the bride is handed over to the groom. A feast is also arranged for the occasion, food offered to the temple. .Blessing from the elders is also sought with bow and it is given by blowing air on rice and cotton and putting on their head.
Performing marriage with the help of a monk or
Lukthak is found to be more cheaper than the traditional Chumulang rite. It also saves the principle of Buddhism. Hence many are opting for marriage with monk or
Lukthak.
Now a days, court marriage is also done. The Chakma Autonomous District Council of Mizoram has also legalized it after codification of Chakma Customary Laws.
(This article was also published on
The Chakma Voice - Global Edition 2011 )